Losing yourself in a relationship

Posted by Karen Degen on 20th May 2013

Tags: relationship

Whenever someone tells me they are afraid of losing themselves in their relationship I instantly know quite a lot about them.  I know that they are the type of person to put others before themselves and in a relationship they will be doing all they can to keep their partner happy, regardless of whether it’s what they want or not.  I know also they aren’t good at saying “no”.  They probably don’t set boundaries and they almost certainly don’t enforce them.  They are likely not the type of person who can speak their truth or tell the other person what they are really feeling.   They can probably tell them the good feelings easily enough, but if they have any fears, doubts or negative emotions they will likely keep them to themselves.  Losing yourself in a relationship says nothing about your partner but a lot about you.  No matter who you are with, the common denominator is you, so to make any relationship better you need to work on changing yourself.